tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post3325828726650241760..comments2023-10-19T12:06:44.542-04:00Comments on Jon's Life. Or Other Odd People Doing Odd Things.: FuFri and Step 1 RevisitedJonathon Arntsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-40864241296432945702010-02-20T10:41:58.520-05:002010-02-20T10:41:58.520-05:00Uber critiquer, my dear, is like a superhero of cr...Uber critiquer, my dear, is like a superhero of critiquers.Jonathon Arntsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-87662066295644256982010-02-20T10:40:42.407-05:002010-02-20T10:40:42.407-05:00OMG, am I an uber-critiquer? Is that a bad thing? ...OMG, am I an uber-critiquer? Is that a bad thing? It sounds horrendous!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03733854662944058955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-66115332796078421752010-02-20T08:43:37.190-05:002010-02-20T08:43:37.190-05:00Sarah - Thanks.
When you guys say "this book...Sarah - Thanks.<br /><br />When you guys say "this book", I laugh because it is nowhere near being a book. But, I also feel inspired to change that.Jonathon Arntsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-48660846057284833592010-02-20T06:59:29.779-05:002010-02-20T06:59:29.779-05:00Jon, I like the new sentence much better. And I...Jon, I like the new sentence much better. And I'm really looking forward to reading this book.<br /><br />Also, I second Floot on the NaNo thing. It's a blast! I've done it five times now. LIVVIE was a NaNo and so was the book I just sent to my agent. That sense of "If I'm crazy for trying this, then so are all these other people" is a motivating feeling!<br /><br />(Plus sometimes people on the NaNo forums let you read their delightful novels!)Sarah Dooleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16554322983327212852noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-79073358242831175102010-02-19T22:02:42.839-05:002010-02-19T22:02:42.839-05:00Terry - I may post some artsy stuff...just maybe.
...Terry - I may post some artsy stuff...just maybe.<br /><br />Jonathon - Your other two comments impressed me! But, please do stop in more often, I appreciate all the advice, input, and expertise I can get around me.Jonathon Arntsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-84781544667885071922010-02-19T21:00:16.799-05:002010-02-19T21:00:16.799-05:00Now that I've commented on your last two posts...Now that I've commented on your last two posts, it's time for this one.<br /><br />Really all I have to say is that your new abstract is much better. It communicates the story as well as got my attention. Your first attempts were... to use a term that I tend to avoid... a little "Lifetime"-y.<br /><br />Keep it up.Jonathonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02434016462153366063noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-19978345677169597012010-02-19T19:21:25.102-05:002010-02-19T19:21:25.102-05:00whatever advice Heather Kelly gave you, I think it...whatever advice Heather Kelly gave you, I think it worked because I like that sentence! I'm not even gay, but it sucked me right in.<br />Perhaps I'll also get to see some of your art on your blog sometime.TerryLynnJohnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08380207155608982319noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-53671885966258996772010-02-19T19:18:52.123-05:002010-02-19T19:18:52.123-05:00Honestly, that's a damn good sentence. I can s...Honestly, that's a damn good sentence. I can see where you might want to hone it a bit with a specific but you've got: <br /><br />PLOT: Two gay teen's paths criss and cross<br /><br />STORY ARC: until they are wrapped around each other<br /><br />CHARACTER ARC: then an even stronger bond forms.VR Barkowskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04927993233682731113noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-19831267845234820312010-02-19T15:59:17.014-05:002010-02-19T15:59:17.014-05:00You should totally try NaNo :D apart from anything...You should totally try NaNo :D apart from anything else, I guarantee you you'll have masses to blog about!<br /><br />I've done it three years, won twice. When you start with barely an idea, write hell for leather, and don't think too much about it, you do end up with some weird, random, or just not very good stuff, but you also end up with good things that you might not think of. It's like putting your brain into writing overdrive. <br /><br />I'll try and remember to bully you some about it come October time ;)Floothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14031254995050992379noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-1083191260605017842010-02-19T14:25:58.854-05:002010-02-19T14:25:58.854-05:00Marisa - If by too critical, you mean you've b...Marisa - If by too critical, you mean you've been out there being an uber critiquer, I couldn't agree more! You'll be able to add it to your Goodreads in, like, four years. I hope you still have your Goodreads, I know I will.<br /><br />HK, et all. - I have increased the asterisks to largest size possible...next time I'm sticking with parenthesis.<br /><br />Floot - Thanks for recognizing what I've been hoping is an improvement. Congrats on attempting NaNo...ugh, I might this year. I like your work-in-progress attitude, it's truly helping me to stay grounded.<br /><br />Kelly - Thank you, no, and yay.Jonathon Arntsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-7518793867043396632010-02-19T13:17:28.052-05:002010-02-19T13:17:28.052-05:00I do like your new sentence better! And I did not...I do like your new sentence better! And I did not know you were an artist. Please show us some of those cars and dress sketches!<br />I believe the 8 ball is correct, sir.Kelly Polarkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10968381456100611120noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-11388896712684858122010-02-19T12:42:34.119-05:002010-02-19T12:42:34.119-05:00I still had to hunt the asterisk. I'ma geddin ...I still had to hunt the asterisk. I'ma geddin old...<br /><br />The new sentence is much snappier and more mysterious - which is good!<br /><br />One thing I found with the different-but-related Two Year Novel course (for reference, you'll find a fairly good description here: http://shop.hollylisle.com/jamaffiliates/jrox.php?id=468_1_tlid_8 - but it's more fun to to in the context of the course on forward motion) is that that initial sentence is infinitely variable till the novel as a whole is done.<br /><br />Mine started as 'a writer gets sucked into <b>his</b> own novel' *laughs*. To put it mildly, it has both grown and changed considerably since that point.<br /><br />Ditto with <i>Tomatoes</i> - if I'd attempted The Sentence before I started it on November 1st (did I mention is was a NaNo? I don't remember...) it would have been something like "Girl who likes gardening learns stuff about life, and, you know, stuff..." ;)Floothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14031254995050992379noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-14543858137150632442010-02-19T12:25:59.289-05:002010-02-19T12:25:59.289-05:00I like the new sentence! And, even though the ast...I like the new sentence! And, even though the asterisk was red by the time I got here, I still had to hunt for the single one. Several times. Oh well.Heather Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06699360166269376285noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-70602945804073372702010-02-19T12:24:24.937-05:002010-02-19T12:24:24.937-05:00Operation Lowered Expectations - Love it, and then...Operation Lowered Expectations - Love it, and then also, I need to get on that. I'm way too critical and therefore NEVER accomplish anything. <br /><br />Hurry up and finish your book so I can add it to my goodreads, k?Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03733854662944058955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-14484551964663080842010-02-19T10:51:36.065-05:002010-02-19T10:51:36.065-05:00TL - Thank you very much! *blushing*
I am glad my ...TL - Thank you very much! *blushing*<br />I am glad my attempts at getting better are...inspiring? I am glad you have confidence in me, it's contagious.<br /><br />TLL - Thorry! I will change them. Right. Now. (<<I've wanted to do that too.)Jonathon Arntsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-45698442964888035582010-02-19T10:36:52.886-05:002010-02-19T10:36:52.886-05:00'Kay, love the new sentence. I can feel your b...'Kay, love the new sentence. I can feel your book and it feels good! And you need to make your asterisks red, especially if they concern me because I am totally blind that way. I went searching all over the place to find what service you provide and there it was right by the magic eight ball. I can appreciate that. You made me laugh!<br /><br />Way to show us how to do it!Tina Laurel Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04482757085942311091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-20920856812715566452010-02-19T10:35:10.764-05:002010-02-19T10:35:10.764-05:00Here's the thing, (and it's important that...Here's the thing, (and it's important that this is said), you rock! Putting this stuff out there, having the guts, makes you awesome! Keep working at it. You can only get better.Tina Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05914428134837892539noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-72274996331516699712010-02-19T09:38:18.464-05:002010-02-19T09:38:18.464-05:00Haha, thanks Denise! i loved that kitty too and y...Haha, thanks Denise! i loved that kitty too and you're so right.Jonathon Arntsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17366218140886892757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1085819220508965925.post-57729840751021861152010-02-19T09:36:38.561-05:002010-02-19T09:36:38.561-05:00you know what they say... If you're not cheati...you know what they say... If you're not cheating, you're not trying hard enough.<br /><br />Thanks, by the way. I firmly believe anyone who looks at a cute kitty and doesn't smile, no matter how bleak their life seems, must be a robo-human.Denisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17417884043856264386noreply@blogger.com